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Thoughts To Ponder

Wear sunscreen.

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Oh, never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they’ve faded. But trust me, in 20 years, you’ll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can’t grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine.

Don’t worry about the future. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, the kind that blindside you at 4 p.m. on some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing every day that scares you.

Sing.

Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts. Don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours.

Floss.

Don’t waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes you’re behind. The race is long and, in the end, it’s only with yourself.

Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements.

Stretch.

Don’t feel guilty if you don’t know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn’t know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives. Some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I know still don’t.

Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees. You’ll miss them when they’re gone.

Maybe you’ll marry, maybe you won’t. Maybe you’ll have children, maybe you won’t. Maybe you’ll divorce at 40, maybe you’ll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don’t congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else’s.

Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can. Don’t be afraid of it or of what other people think of it. It’s the greatest instrument you’ll ever own.

Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but your living room.

Read the directions, even if you don’t follow them.

Do not read beauty magazines. They will only make you feel ugly.

Get to know your parents. You never know when they’ll be gone for good. Be nice to your siblings. They’re your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.

Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard. Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft. Travel.

Accept certain inalienable truths: Prices will rise. Politicians will philander. You, too, will get old. And when you do, you’ll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.

Respect your elders.

Don’t expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund. Maybe you’ll have a wealthy spouse. But you never know when either one might run out.

Don’t mess too much with your hair or by the time you’re 40 it will look 85.

Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it’s worth.

But trust me on the sunscreen. – Mary Schmich

  • Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
  • No man is an island.
  • What goes around, comes around.
  • You can understand and relate to most people better if you look at them — no matter how old or impressive they may be — as if they are children. For most of us never really grow up or mature all that much — we simply grow taller. O, to be sure, we laugh less and play less and wear uncomfortable disguises like adults, but beneath the costume is the child we always are, whose needs are simple, whose daily life is still best described by fairy tales. – Leo Rosten
  • Watch your thoughts; they become words. Watch your words; they become actions. Watch your actions; they become habits. Watch your habits; they become character. Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.
  • If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day, so I never have to live without you. – Winnie the Pooh
  • When you just stand back and watch the way he talks, hear the way he laughs and all the silly jokes he makes or even when he’s being completely ridiculous and goofy, you still think, ‘God, I am the luckiest girl in the world’… that’s love.
  • Whatever you give a woman, she will make it greater. Give her sperm, she will give you a baby. Give her a house, she will give you a home. Give her groceries, she will give you a meal. Give her a smile and she will give you her heart. She multiplies and enlarges what she is given. So if you give her crap, be ready to receive a ton of sh*t…
  • Knowing is not enough; we must apply. Being willing is not enough; we must do.
  • A friendship that can cease has never been real.
  • Friendship isn’t about whom you have known the longest… It’s about who came, and never left your side.
  • The worst solitude is to be destitute of sincere friendship. – Sir Francis Bacon
  • Each of us is a truly unique being; in the eyes of the ones that love us best.
  • Be who you are, and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.  – Dr. Seuss
  • Be courteous to all, but intimate with few, and let those few be well tried before you give them your confidence. True friendship is a plant of slow growth, and must undergo and withstand the shocks of adversity before it is entitled to the appellation. – George Washington
  • There is nothing like the razor sharp tongue of a good friend to cut through the lies we tell ourselves. – Laura Moncur
  • Happiness is always a by-product. It is probably a matter of temperament, and for anything I know it may be glandular. But it is not something that can be demanded from life, and if you are not happy you had better stop worrying about it and see what treasures you can pluck from your own brand of unhappiness. – Robertson Davies
  • ‘Tis better to be silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt. – Abraham Lincoln
  • Great minds discuss ideas. Average minds discuss events. Small minds discuss people. – Eleanor Roosevelt
  • If I had my child to raise all over again; I’d do less correcting & more connecting, fingerpaint more & point fingers less, take my eyes off my watch & watch with my eyes, care to know less & know to care more, stop playing serious & seriously play, I’d take time to see the trees & acorns more often, be firm less often & affirm much more, model less about the love of power-and more about the power of love.

One Flaw In Women

Women have strengths that amaze men.

They bear hardships and they carry burdens,

but they hold happiness, love and joy.

They smile when they want to scream.

They sing when they want to cry.

They cry when they are happy

and laugh when they are nervous.

They fight for what they believe in.

They stand up to injustice.

They don’t take “no” for an answer

when they believe there is a better solution.

They go without so their family can have.

They go to the doctor with a frightened friend.

They love unconditionally.

They cry when their children excel

and cheer when their friends get awards.

They are happy when they hear about

a birth or a wedding.

Their hearts break when a friend dies.

They grieve at the loss of a family member,

yet they are strong when they

think there is no strength left.

They know that a hug and a kiss

can heal a broken heart.

Women come in all shapes, sizes and colors.

They’ll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you

to show how much they care about you.

The heart of a woman is what

makes the world keep turning.

They bring joy, hope and love.

They have compassion and ideas.

They give moral support to their

family and friends.

Women have vital things to say

and everything to give.

HOWEVER, IF THERE IS ONE FLAW IN WOMEN,

IT IS THAT THEY FORGET THEIR WORTH.

————————————————————————————————————–

The Art of Sexual Warfare

One of the biggest failures of mankind
is our view of sex. No one cares enough anymore
to take the time to treat sex
in the manner that it was ordained to be treated- as a
symbol of spiritual unity, and an illustration of what
oneness means. It was designed to make plain to humans
that there is greater pleasure in union than
there is in division, so that man could

see
feel
and understand

how hatred and war could never satisfy us.
And no matter how much we stab the eyes
until they bleed tears… no matter how many times
earth takes a sip of human blood, that natural desire
for unity is still there. We’ve just simply become too impatient,
too ready to meet immediate results. We want the pleasure
of unity, minus the time and effort it takes to become one in,
not only body,
but in heart, soul, and mind, too.

But if I do recall, a divided house
cannot
and will not
stand.

It is not enough
to be one in body, when every other aspect
of mankind is separated and greatly divided.
Together,
the bodies will meet self-destruction.

But one by one,
the souls will fall,
the hearts will detonate,
the minds will break loose and wreak havoc.

And what nature of people
will we be then?
Why, we’ll be just as we are now.

So am I telling what is to come, or are we
already there?

I guess… to put it simply,
when did sex get cheapened down
to a mere means
of quick entertainment?
I assume it happened around the same time
that man began playing
with the idea
of unifying in a peaceful state
of oneness. But in their playing, they never
take the time
to explore the ecstasy
of obliterating vendettas and prejudice
in order to come together
as human beings.

Instead, we settle for a quick fix.

But when it’s over,
we’re still broken. When it’s over,
the thrill is gone. And we go right back
to what we were doing before:

searching… lusting… starving…

partaking of the same intimate drink
from different cups,
but never quite satisfied. ~ Joy Elliot

————————————————————————————————————–

Live A Life That Matters

Ready or not,
someday it will all come to an end.
There will be no more sunrises,
no minutes, hours or days.

All the things you collected,
whether treasured or forgotten,
will pass to someone else.

Your wealth,
fame and temporal power
will shrivel to irrelevance.
It will not matter what you owned
or what you were owed.

Your grudges, resentments,
frustrations, and jealousies
will finally disappear.

So, too, your hopes,
ambitions, plans,
and to-do lists will expire.
The wins and losses
that once seemed so important
will fade away.

It won’t matter where you came from,
or on what side of the tracks you lived,
at the end.

It won’t matter whether
you were beautiful or brilliant
Even your gender and
skin color will be irrelevant.

So what will matter?
How will the value of your days be
measured?

What will matter is not what you bought,
but what you built;
not what you got,
but what you gave.

What will matter is not your success,
but your significance.

What will matter is not what you learned,
but what you taught.

What will matter
is every act of integrity,
compassion, courage or sacrifice
that enriched, empowered
or encouraged others to emulate your example.

What will matter
is not your competence,
but your character.

What will matter
is not how many people you knew,
but how many will feel
a lasting loss when you’re gone.

What will matter
is not your memories,
but the memories that live in those who
loved you.

What will matter
is how long you will be remembered,
by whom and for what.

Living a life that matters
doesn’t happen by accident.
it’s not a matter of circumstance
but of choice.

Choose to live a life that matters. ~ Michael Josephson

————————————————————————————————————–

“You can shed tears that she is gone, or you can smile because she has lived. You can close your eyes and pray that she’ll come back, or you can open your eyes and see all she’s left. Your heart can be empty because you can’t see her, or you can be full of the love you shared. You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday, or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday. You can remember her only that she is gone, or you can cherish her memory and let it live on. You can cry and close your mind, be empty and turn your back. Or you can do what she’d want: smile, open your eyes, love and go on.” ~ David Harkins

“Crawling in a hole can be useful as long as you do not pull the dirt in behind you. Where else can you hide and still have hopes those critters chasing you will fall in and not get out. If you dug the hole only you know how to climb out.” ~ unknown

————————————————————————————————————–

Father Forgets

Listen, son: I am saying this as you lie asleep, one little paw crumpled under your cheek and the blond curls stickily wet on your damp forehead. I have stolen into your room alone. Just a few minutes ago, as I sat reading my paper in the library, a stifling wave of remorse swept over me. Guiltily I came to your bedside. There are the things I was thinking, son: I had been cross to you. I scolded you as you were dressing for school because you gave your face merely a dab with a towel. I took you to task for not cleaning your shoes. I called out angrily when you threw some of your things on the floor. At breakfast I found fault, too. You spilled things. You gulped down your food. You put your elbows on the table. You spread butter too thick on your bread. And as you started off to play and I made for my train, you turned and waved a hand and called, “Goodbye, Daddy!” and I frowned, and said in reply, “Hold your shoulders back!” Then it began all over again in the late afternoon. As I came up the road I spied you, down on your knees, playing marbles. There were holes in your stockings. I humiliated you before your boyfriends by marching you ahead of me to the house. Stockings were expensive-and if you had to buy them you would be more careful! Imagine that, son, from a father! Do you remember, later, when I was reading in the library, how you came in timidly, with a sort of hurt look in your eyes? When I glanced up over my paper, impatient at the interruption, you hesitated at the door. “What is it you want?” I snapped. You said nothing, but ran across in one tempestuous plunge, and threw your arms around my neck and kissed me, and your small arms tightened with an affection that God had set blooming in your heart and which even neglect could not wither. And then you were gone, pattering up the stairs. Well, son, it was shortly afterwards that my paper slipped from my hands and a terrible sickening fear came over me. What has habit been doing to me? The habit of finding fault, of reprimanding-this was my reward to you for being a boy. It was not that I did not love you; it was that I expected too much of youth. I was measuring you by the yardstick of my own years. And there was so much that was good and fine and true in your character. The little heart of you was as big as the dawn itself over the wide hills. This was shown by your spontaneous impulse to rush in and kiss me good night. Nothing else matters tonight, son. I have come to your bedside in the darkness, and I have knelt there, ashamed! It is feeble atonement; I know you would not understand these things if I told them to you during your waking hours. But tomorrow I will be a real daddy! I will chum with you, and suffer when you suffer, and laugh when you laugh. I will bite my tongue when impatient words come. I will keep saying as if it were a ritual: “He is nothing but a boy-a little boy!” I am afraid I have visualised you as a man. Yet as I see you now, son, crumpled and weary in your cot, I see that you are still a baby. Yesterday you were in your mother’s arms, your head on her shoulder. I have asked too much, too much, yet given too little of myself. Promise me, as I teach you to have the manners of a man, that you will remind me how to have the loving spirit of a child. ~ W. Livingston Larned

————————————————————————————————————-

When a man points a finger at someone else, he should remember that four of his fingers are pointing at himself.  ~ Louis Nizer

We are made wise not by the recollection of our past, but by the responsibility for our future.  ~ George Bernard Shaw

A person soon learns how little he knows when a child begins to ask questions. ~ Richard L. Evans

Don’t demand respect as a parent. Demand civility and insist on honesty. But respect is something you must earn with kids as well as with adults. ~ William Attwood

————————————————————————————————————————————

An elderly Cherokee Native American was teaching his grandchildren about life…

He said to them, “A fight is going on inside me, it is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves.

One wolf is evil — he is fear, anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, competition, superiority and ego.

The other is good—he is joy, peace, love, hope, sharing, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, friendship, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith.

This same fight is going on inside you, and inside every other person, too.”

They thought about it for a minute and then one child asked his grandfather, “Which wolf will win?”

The old Cherokee simply replied: “The one you feed”

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